When the mind is clear, and there are no external debt pressures it becomes easier to concentrate on emotional aspects of life. How so? We accept material problems cause stress. My opinion is the moment we enter into debt the inner being senses the long-term commitment. The commitment is often restrictive and continues for many years. For two examples; consider the possibility loans imprison people into jobs they do not like, and trap others in relationships they would prefer to leave. Some people subject themselves to situations like this and consequently lead desperate and unhappy existences.
Our emotions seem to control many foolish choices and are directly influential to material decisions. I comment to my friend ‘Do you need a newer car?’ she answers ‘I like the feeling of prestige’ that’s fine, although I know she is running close to the limit of her resources. Notice the important word in her reply: it is: ‘feeling’.
Her emotions are controlling her choices, and there is a real danger of problems ahead. Although I like my friend, I am not her keeper, whatever she does is her concern. I would not comment ‘I told you so’ or lose a seconds sleep if she is heading into heavy seas.
The choice is this: do we allow the intellect to control emotions or emotions to control the intellect? My friend has always preferred the latter. As a consequence, she has entered difficult situations without thought and paid the price later. I would suggest if she learned how to think with well-defined reason, the problems encountered would be few, if any at all. Anyone who takes time to learn to think with critical assessment will soon have control over their emotions. This is not to say their character and personality will change. The concept suggests an ability to control situations and not allow false intuitive choices to be made. Of course, very few people can achieve this goal! I’m still learning about critical observation.
The ability to learn to control one’s emotions should be considered. This idea is often countered with ‘I cannot change the way I am’ or ‘This is a family trait’. The theory of family traits is flawed. There are many millionaire business people, world celebrities, national figures who have suicidal children, poverty-stricken siblings and atrocious parents. Excuses are as easy to make and habit forming. What if’s and ‘it’s all the managements fault’ are the blindfolds to the truth of many sources of discord. Every excuse is formulated from an emotive perspective. When someone is in trouble, they look for reason or blame. To gain allies the game is to evoke emotive sympathy. Once this methodology is used a few times, it becomes the only way of dealing with a problem.
Emotions can be the driving force of the proverbial wheel of fortune. I listened to two young girls talk about a relationship. ‘I don’t need relationship’ the other answered ‘I cannot be without a partner’ As I thought about the connotation or the two sentences I was reminded that people do ‘need’ other people. Although, as we become older our understanding of relationships is more enlightened. The caveat to this comment is understanding relationships is a very difficult indeed. However, it is clear that people who have a common purpose and objective, are happier than those who live life from day to day.
The emotional aspect of well being is enhanced when we can think about the reality of any situation. If someone continually hurts us or we continuously hurt them, we cannot love or care for them. Happiness is hard gained and requires acceptance of our faults. This can result in the pain of emotional discord which is why many people avoid the cathartic exercise. Again, an active balance of intellectual and emotional thinking helps us in the quest to discover peace. From my viewpoint, there is a constant reflection on the material, intellectual and emotional aspects of my existence. If there is a problem, I will deal with it no matter how hard the method needed to return the status quo. The reader should understand I will take any course needed to rectify a situation. Even if the solution costs time, money or effort, there is no baulking away the inevitable.
Do not feel my words are fixed solutions which will work for everyone. The suggestion is a human who wishes to become a ‘Well Being’ could consider three primary aspects of their existence. The material, emotional, and intellectual and with careful attention to each one they will live a balanced life. The ways to achieve this end are discovered in this and the previous essay. Agreed these are only seeds of ideas and require a significant degree of determination to see results. With this in mind, we should accept, if the objective is to become a Well Being then life or existence may not be perfect. Many people fail to realise if they are unhappy, looking for reasons for the problem is not always the answer. This article suggests seeking ways to live life well and with integrity will overwhelm many restrictive issues and worries.
In the first part of this article, the word cornerstone is used and I have only written about three corners. To stabilise the article we consider the fourth aspect. It is embodied in the word ‘creativity’. When combining the three previous considerations, the mind will become creative. Every problem, objective, idea, suggestion or proposal has material, intellectual and emotional viewpoints. Most people only consider their Well Being as a group of issues or ideas to be navigated. When one takes the holistic approach, solutions are discovered and the world of possibilities changes to a world of probabilities.
The human race is not in a race. It is at a standstill. There are few people who can make a difference to the external environment. Those who could hang onto their beliefs without regard to the millions who are desolated by their stagnated minds. My feeling is those who understand the imperative need to become a Well Being are indifferent to those who feel there are saviours around the corner. There is a saviour in all of us; it is our mind which contains our thoughts. Those who control their thoughts – Control their destiny and become a Well Being.
See You Soon
If you wish to read more about my philosophies try Never Let Anything Worry You