How Your Mind Processes Information Around You.   

We all have our own internal hard drive and chose to save and deleted the parts of our life events that no longer fit, and sometimes we store them deep with the subconscious mind for another time. We can store information through our senses in pictures (visual), sounds(auditory) and feelings(kinaesthetic). 

When we experience something new, we categorise through our amygdala whether it is a fight flight or freeze response and file accordingly, alongside similar experiences you have previously stored. 

In today’s fast-moving society where stress is all around us, we can all too easily excerpt our fight or flight responses daily. When we put ourselves in a situation where we are constantly triggering the threat response, we can very quickly become depleted as we flood our body with adrenaline and other chemicals.

grayscale photo of people at market

Complex Society

I invite you to take the time to think of an event in your life when your body was flooded in this way and to bring forward the cost to your body, what happened and how it affected you. Staying in such a state can make you extremely ill, mentally, and physically. 

Another way our mind processes information around us is to seek out that which is similar. This could be your surroundings or people. We know that likeminded people enjoy gathering. Beit artists, writers, musicians etc we all enjoy the energy from other like-minded souls.  

Forming relationships in these groups makes us feel more comfortable and is known as mirroring. We know that the human mind processes and stores information in many ways and if we match their representation system, we can play this to an advantage. 

young asian female looking at reflection

Mirroring Another’s Representation

Observing the fact that only about 10% of communication are words and 90% is about how those words are delivered I invite you to think of a person you know and observe how they hold themselves. By that I mean do they hold their head and back straight or are they more rounded. Do they tilt their head a lot when talking or fold their arms or point a lot, take a moment to observe how they convey themselves?  

One of the best ways to get into instant rapport with someone is to observe their body posture and reflect it back without being too obvious about it. It is worth paying attention to the sound of the conversation as there are three elements to sound, pace, rhythm, and volume.  

The next time you are in conversation with someone I encourage you to notice the speed at which the person is speaking, is it calm, erratic or joyful. We all have a rhythm to the way we speak, notice the pace at which the conversation is set. You can try this out with friends and family to perfect your skill 

When you match the speed of the conversation you match the speed of the person’s body rhythm, allowing them to relax. When you pay attention to these three key factors of sound, pace, and rhythm you will have effortless rapport.

Jane Osbourne

Jane’s Website

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